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Gift-Giving Manners
Giving gifts is a wonderful gesture but have you ever noticed that people give gifts very differently?
Gift-Giving Personalities
I remember noticing the difference between my sister and me. My sister is very practical and would choose to give diapers as a baby shower gift, where I would prefer to opt for an engraved silver baby cup since I’m so sentimental and love the thought of creating family heirlooms. It’s funny, but my sister would see no need for something so impractical, and I would consider diapers not very special or memorable. It’s like we have different gift-giving personalities.
On the other hand, my sister always makes my day when she gets me shoes for my birthday. They are always cute shoes that add to my wardrobe something that I wouldn’t purchase for myself. It’s great fun and I love her thoughtfulness.
The Right Gift
Occasions arise regularly where we all feel like we are searching for the right gift idea, one that will be well-received. When it comes to selecting a gift for someone, good gift-giving manners would call for us to consider the interest of the other person. We should take into consideration their preferences and sensibilities when giving a gift. We should never give a gift in hopes of reforming the other person. If we love to read and the one for whom we are purchasing a gift loves to fish but can’t be bothered with books, we shouldn’t choose a book for them. Our gift should reflect the preferences of the one to whom we are giving the gift, not our own.
Gift Suggestions
When it comes to our children, we must teach them gift receiving manners as well. When our children are asked for suggestions that is exactly what they should give, not a shopping list. Some children know explicitly what they want, and that turns the other person into their personal shopper: “I want the classroom wardrobe for my Molly doll, and the latest Casting Crowns CD and silver hoop earrings.”
Suggestions should be general suggestions, not a shopping list. For instance: “I always like things for my dolls, music or jewelry, but anything is fine—being surprised is fun.”
Giving in Moderation
The amount to spend is always a delicate subject but can be wrapped up in one word: moderation. When we spend too much on a person, it could make them feel uncomfortable or like they need to reciprocate. On the other hand, when we have given little thought or resources to a gift, it can appear to send a message to the receiver that they are of little value to us.
With a little consideration, and the example of the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” you can give with a cheerful heart and make the right gift-giving choice.
Copyright © 2008-2015 Debbie Reynolds Harper
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