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How to Gain New Energy and Clear Vision! Remove False Burden-Bearing!

     One of the enemy’s traps used to zap us of our strength, joy, and energy is getting us to carry a burden that we were not meant to carry. I call this “False Burden-Bearing.” We believe that it is our God-given responsibility to take care of someone or something, when it isn’t. This can cause us to become confused, negative, or unthankful. We begin to lose our joy and strength and don’t know why. The enemy uses different ways to trap us into taking on burdens, depending on our particular circumstances and personality. But the objective is the same: to make you take on a burden that Jesus was meant to carry.

     Dear reader, my prayer is that through sharing this experience, you will be able to quickly recognize this scheme of the enemy. This is a defensive-strategy that every Believer can use to help win the war and advance God’s Kingdom purpose in your life and family!

The Situation:

     Recently, my husband and I helped someone very dear to us. The person is a Christian and has greatly influenced our life. In the process, we discovered we had been led to believe things that were not true. Someone we loved and trusted had lied and we had been deceived. We checked all the facts. We had never known this person to lie. Yet, right there in black and white, the lies stared us in the face. The person denied it all despite our presentation of the evidence and confronting with truth.

     For me, shock set in. I went through the hurt, sought God for healing, and we forgave the person. However, because of the abrupt change in standards and behavior, we needed to set boundaries that were not in place before. We could no longer allow access to our private lives and information. We still loved but could not trust. The relationship became more and more difficult.

     I felt so drained and began to second-guess myself on things that I had been sure about before. I prayed and asked God to search my heart. I prayed for God to bless this person until I was blue in the face! Still I knew that I was missing God somewhere in the process. When I would hear from this person, my spirit would be so troubled that I couldn’t shake it.

     As I was lamenting to a friend about the situation, she explained, “Dorena, you have to face what happened. You are still in shock and trying to make sense of something that you will never make sense out of. Accept that it will never make sense.” Then, she offered, “Have you considered the reason this person continues to deny the truth may actually be a psychological disorder or a spiritual problem? In other words, the person may need mental or spiritual help that you cannot give. The person is not in their right state of mind.”

     I had thought of that and I wanted to help this person. If they could face what they did and get it right with God, then perhaps they could get healing. I knew God would not want our relationship to stay like this. Then as the Holy Spirit guided my friend’s words she said, “Dorena, you are not responsible for someone else’s state of mind.” Those words triggered a light switch in my spirit. A light came on where there had previously been darkness and confusion. I began to see clearly what had been happening.  My physical body immediately felt like a large weight had been removed from my shoulders. I began to feel new energy. For the first time in weeks, I felt positive and hopeful where I had been feeling negative and confused. It was bizarre. This whole sensation happened within 30 seconds and I felt like new person.  

     I realized that I had taken on a burden that only Jesus was meant to carry. Romans 1:28 uses the term “reprobate mind.” The context of this chapter discusses Gentile idolaters. However, there is a general principle regarding sin that applies here. When someone chooses to sin and refuses to repent, and stay in that sin, they start down a slippery slope. Eventually, they become unaware they are rejecting God’s truth, His mercy, and forgiveness. Scripture states that when this happens God gives them over to a reprobate mind, which is unable to discern right from wrong, particularly in spiritual things.

     It is a willful decision on the part of another precious human being made in the image of God. It grieves His heart but He allows free-will. It grieved me to see this loved one fall down that slippery slope. But it was not my responsibility to make them see their error. I was not responsible for their state of mind. Each time we would speak, my spirit would be so vexed at the deception this fellow believer would not see. I too had bought into a lie of the enemy and believed I was not doing my duty if I did not help them become whole again. I also felt condemnation (versus conviction from the Holy Spirit) and began to believe I was an unforgiving, revengeful person for feeling the way that I did and setting the necessary boundaries.

     When I realized the truth and released this “false burden,” I gained such clarity of the situation and no longer felt vexed in my spirit. I remembered a dream (that I now believe the Lord gave my daughter) only a few nights before I released this burden to Jesus. In the dream, my daughter saw this person dressed in strange clothing and shoes that made it difficult to walk.  The person fell, broke their leg, and then died. At first, I brushed it off as a bad “pizza dream.” But as I pondered this dream, I saw how God was trying to give me a different perspective.

     In dreams, clothing is often an indicator of identity, function, or vocation of a person. Shoes can indicate someone’s spiritual walk. In the dream, the person had changed their identity from what we once knew. Their spiritual walk was precarious. Eventually because of these decisions, they had an accident. The accident caused harm and lead to spiritual death.

     I realized that I had no knowledge of why the person chose to do these things. However, they had a spiritual accident that caused great harm. If someone I loved had an accident in real-life, would I be angry at them? No. If they made foolish and selfish decisions that led to that accident making the accident their fault, would I be angry at them? Yes at first, but I wouldn’t love them any less and I would pray for them even more.

The Hope:

     Although the situation is not a pleasant one at this time, that perspective makes it possible to deal with and accept. I am no longer yoked with a heavy burden. My spirit is now at peace and I have a thankful heart again. One of the things that I thank God for are friends for the journey that He uses to bring us perspective when we can’t see it ourselves. It is our prayer at www,MyFriendDebbie.com that you too find inspiration, encouragement, and information for your journey as we share stories of our journey with you.

Copyright © 2008-2015 Dorena DellaVecchio, Ph.D.

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