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When You and Your Child's Teacher Disagree

    With one student graduated and two more moving through our educational system, I would love to sit back and tell you that this journey through gaining knowledge is nothing but lollipops and rainbows but I'd be a big fat liar if I did.  You see, there do come times (whether in public school, private school or a homeschooling co-op) where you and your student's teacher may not see eye to eye. The question is . . . is it really worth gouging out that individual's eye in order to get what you want?

    Just the other day, a friend of mine reminded me of how frustrating it can be when you feel like you are being reasonable, you explain to a teacher why you feel a particular situation is not right, yet the teacher still does not see the matter in the same light as you do.  What next?  (Put the boxing gloves away Momma because even though it may feel right at the time, prayer is truly the only way to begin such a battle.)  It's more than okay for you to feel your "I'm sticking up for my kid no matter what" instincts, however, let's remind ourselves and even move our focus to the WORD where Jesus shows us over and over how "a gentle answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs up anger."  (Proverbs 15:1 NIV).  Let's also be reminded in that Jesus wasn't about "his rights" more than honoring His Father in Heaven.  Here are a few questions I ask myself before deciding on how far I dig my heels in on an educational matter with my student's teacher.

    1)  Will this keep them out of Harvard?  -- I jokingly ask myself this question but with an             undertone of seriousness.  If my student is elementary or middle school, the ruling of a grade or even behavioral outcome may not be as impacting as if my student is in high school. Truly weigh out how much the teacher's and your difference will impact your student's future.

    2)  Have I asked the Lord for wisdom and is He (maybe) doing a greater work? -- This is a tough question to ask, but God is not always about what seems so obvious to us. Sometimes (often times) there is a greater work in our student or even ourselves that is taking place. When we truly humble ourselves before Him, He will shed greater light on what our actions should be next.

    3)  Is this an opportunity for me to teach my child something more important?  --  Sometimes life just isn't fair.  This could be one of those times where the Lord wants you to walk through the process of it not being fair and the steps on how to handle that as well as move forward.

    4)  Is my precious darling telling me everything? -- As much as we'd love to believe that our child would "never forget" to give us important information to every situation that comes up in his/her life, the fact remains that we have "all been born with sin" and all have that survival instinct of not wanting to get into trouble. Be sure to truly investigate all angles of a situation with a very open mind. Sometimes we are surprised as to what Little Pumpkin "forgets" to mention.

    5)  Is it the time to take a stand? -- There are times when God has just called us to dig deep and stand up for what is right and true.  There is NOTHING wrong with doing that - as long as your words and deeds are still honoring towards the teacher and that God is pleased with how you are conducting yourself.  Young eyes are constantly watching you.

    Journeying with our students as they grow older, make new friendships, come into contact with new challenges, etc is not for the faint of heart.  But God will ALWAYS honor our commitment to our child when we are constantly seeking His face.  Remember, the goal in raising these sweet cherubs is not always to prove when we are right but to honor our Father in every situation - even when that sometimes means not getting what we want.  It goes against every "fleshly" fiber of our being doesn't it?  But, if  our true track is Heavenward than I can tell you this . . . . Harvard isn't necessarily a pits top along the way to growing closer to our Lord and Savior and to growing more like Him.  God Bless you in your educational journey with your child(ren) and never . . .  never lose heart.

Copyright © 2008-2015 Cindy Aitken

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